It's hard for me to believe, but Jeanne's been at Hillcrest Care Center (her skilled nursing facility) for 8 months. In terms of her health, it's been a real roller-coaster ride. In terms of her care, it's been an amazing learning experience for me.
Like most every caregiver that I know, I promised Jeanne that she would never find herself in a nursing home. I spent years doing everything possible to keep her out of one. I stopped working for a few years to be on hand to care for her. I hired full-time caregivers...who evolved into live-in caregivers...to assist her when I was out of the house. I did everything that I could...including going broke in the process.
Finally, last fall, Jeanne's doctors and some of our closest and most trusted friends at the Southern California Chapter of the National Multiple Sclerosis Society prevailed upon me to consider a nursing home. As I've chronicled here, I liked everything that I saw and heard when I visited Hillcrest and sat down with their executive director, Brad DeHaan. But I still had concerns, misgivings, guilt (LOTS of guilt) and a whole variety of other emotions to work through.
Well, here we are 8 months later and I have to repeat what I've already said on this blog -- Jeanne is receiving a higher level of care at Hillcrest than she received at home. She's in a better place. Have their been bumps in the road? It wouldn't be real life without them. Have I found myself frustrated at times? Of course. But I experienced bumps in the road and frustration while Jeanne was still at home -- it has something to do with this not being a perfect world that we live in.
Bottom line -- Jeanne's doctors and our friends were right. They could see things more clearly than I could and as a result of their strong lobbying efforts, I did the best thing for Jeanne. I continue to visit her every day...and I continue to advocate on her behalf. And I've been told more than once by the nurses on staff at Hillcrest that Jeanne benefits from my advocacy, so it's a role that pays off in important dividends.
But Jeanne's transition to Hillcrest has also had a profound effect on the quality of my life, as well. I have options. I have free time to enjoy. I have the opportunity to pursue a variety of interests -- including a new career path that combines the things that I learned in the course of a successful business career with the things that I learned as a caregiver! But that's a subject for another day.
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